begin at the beginning...

I have written this post about a hundred times in my head over the past few days.  How to begin, where to start, what exactly to share?  Well, here goes, and I'll warn you it may get a little long as I try to give all the details to help this all make sense.

This was our family in 2007.  We were on vacation in Disney World, and we were anxiously awaiting an adoption referral for a little boy in Guatemala.  We got that referral, and within two months we lost that referral because his birth mother changed her mind about placing him for adoption.  We were heartbroken, but we decided we would attempt to adopt from Ethiopia (Guatemalan adoptions were stopping due to their noncompliance with Hague regulations).  Now mind you, we felt that God had placed this adoption desire on our hearts, but instead of seeking Him to really guide us, we were pressing ahead with what WE felt was the right plan.  By October 2007 we had gotten together a dossier to be sent to Ethiopia.  At the same time, however, Scott was training to run a marathon.  About two weeks out from the marathon he began to complain about constant pressure in his head (like when you stand up too quickly).  He decided to see the doctor, insisting the doctor order a chest x-ray.  On a Friday Scott saw the doctor and had the x-ray, on Monday he had a biopsy on the 10 centimeter mass that was discovered in his chest via that x-ray, on Thursday we had a cancer diagnosis, and the following Monday he began chemo.  Our "perception" of our life totally blown to bits...

  This was our new reality and how we ended 2007.  I actually struggled with putting this picture on here.  While I am eternally grateful for the refining work God did in me and Scott though Scott's cancer diagnosis, it is still hits a pretty raw nerve to look at these pictures.  Our adoption journey came to complete and understandable stand-still for about a year.  Praise the Lord, Scott's cancer responded very well to the chemo, and we resumed our "new normal" in the spring of 2008.  At that point we decided we might be interested in resuming an adoption process, but every way we turned internationally the doors were slamming in our faces.  Between adoption doors closing and our new found infertility secondary to chemo, it began to really look like we were going to be a family of three.  So I tried to focus on being content with the child we had been given the responsibility to parent...but I couldn't shake that desire to adopt.  I pleaded with God to take the desire away or somehow open the adoption door for us.

I had befriended a woman named Amanda who I am now certain the Lord used to help orchestrate our adoption of Ben.  She became aware of him and his need for an adoptive family in January 2009.  She contacted us to let us know about this situation, and 32 days later we were bringing Ben home from the hospital.  This precious little baby boy who is absolutely perfect for our family!  He is so calm and loving; wonderfully knit together in his birth mother's womb, and graciously given to us with the awesome task of loving and nurturing and teaching him the gospel of Jesus.

In December 2010, we were again made aware of Madelyn and her need for an adoptive family.  We were of course interested in adopting again, so we submitted a portfolio for her birth parents to review, and they selected us to be Madelyn's family.  Again, to love, nurture, and share with her the gospel and how valuable and beautiful she is because she is created in the image of a Holy God.

  So here I am, feeling overwhelmingly blessed to be "momma" to three wonderfully precious kids.  Although some days I could stop simply at overwhelmed, I am reminded that God has approved and entrusted me with His gospel to teach to these kids.  And I can do this through Christ who gives me strength (especially on those days when I feel like a complete failure!).

Now since 2008 we had been told we no longer qualified to adopt from any international country besides Ethiopia due to Scott's health history.  But we of course continued to have our hearts broken for the MILLIONS of orphans around the globe.  This past November, a couple of my friends who are "super-woman" orphan advocates posted on their blogs to educate folks about Orphan Awareness Month and to advocate for a few special children listed through Lifeline Children's Services.  As I read through the blog and then looked at the listing of children, one little 3 year old boy in China caught my attention.  He also caught Marleigh's attention :)  So, I decided to email for some information about this little boy (I've always been one to "test" the rules; I guess Marleigh gets it honest).  Within 5 hours, I had a whole file of information complete with medical records and pictures.  The next day I shared this information with Scott while he was home for lunch.  He quietly ate his lunch while studying the file, and then he got up from the table and asked what we needed to do to try to adopt this little boy.  We submitted a doctor's letter from Scott's oncologist along with several other "official documents" and two weeks later we had been given permission from the CCCWA (Chinese adoption officials) to adopt "Brennan"!!!  Us, the couple who had been told for 4 years we no longer qualified because of health history!

Brennan, whose 4th birthday is today, does have a couple of physical special needs.  He was born with an under-developed left ear, and he does not have a right radius or ulna.  He was abandoned at the orphanage at around one month old, and he has lived his entire life to this point at the orphanage.  In Ch*na, with the one child policy, this is not an uncommon occurrence if a child is born with any physical handicaps.  These children also age out of the system at 14 years of age!  They are sent out from the orphanage with no home or family to go to and are discriminated against by potential employers because they were orphans; it is a very bleak future for them to put it mildly.  I couldn't bear the thought of this kind of a future for this sweet boy  who had captured my heart right through the computer screen.

So here we go, off to Ch*na for our second son!  It is still surreal!!!  We are almost to the point of having our dossier authenticated and sent to Ch*na.  Our hope is that we can travel to bring Brennan home by the end of the year.  We would greatly appreciate your prayers on our behalf.  In particular, grace and promptness in the paperwork processing, and that God will prepare our hearts as well as Brennan's and knit us together as a family.  

  I am going to attempt to blog more regularly about this process, so I will give more detailed information later.  For now, I think this is as much of the story as anyone wants/has time and attention span to read :)  There are some pretty amazing stories, though, about how the hand of Almighty God has so evidently been on all this!  I'm excited to share more later!  (And I'll also figure out how to add an adoption timeline on here for anyone interested in that as well.)

Blessings,
Mika